Team Trump lawyer blames a dead man for election fraud

Team Trump lawyer blames a dead man for election fraud

Rudy Giuliani giving a press conference

Screenshot / YouTube

If anyone is seriously concerned about the legitimacy of the election results — well, they shouldn’t be. Trump’s lawyers Rudy Giuliani and Sidney Powell have just revealed who is behind the election fraud: Hugo Chávez.

Hang on…didn’t he die in 2013?

Rudy literally sweated the color out of his hair

Rudy Giuliani looking like he is about to cry

Screenshot / YouTube

Thursday’s press conference was reliably entertaining. Rudy Giuliani literally sweated the dye right out of his hair. The stress of claiming wildly unfounded accusations must be getting to him. The late night hosts had a field day with the rivers of black sweat running down Giuliani’s face.

Another member of Trump’s legal team also took the stand: Sidney Powell had some grave warnings about the real source of the rigged election, which could have come from the grave. Powell stated that “a massive influence of communist money through Venezuela, Cuba, and likely China” had meddled in the U.S. election.

Powell also claimed that the Dominion Voting Systems was linked to the now late Hugo Chávez.

Chávez probably has WIFI and a laptop in his grave

Hugo Chavez smiling

Flickr / Dilma Rousseff

According to Powell,

The Dominion Voting Systems, the Smartmatic software and the software that goes in other computerized voting systems as well, not just Dominion, were created in Venezuela at the direction of Hugo Chavez to make sure he never lost an election after one constitutional referendum came out the way he did not want it to come out.

Here’s where she is wrong.

Dominion Voting Systems and Smartmatic are companies that make electronic voting systems, they do not manufacture software for changing election results. Neither are based in Venezuela. Dominion Voting Systems is headquartered in Ontario, California, and Smartmatic is in Boca Raton, Florida.

My uncle Dave saw a seagull on polling day he thinks is a Dem spy…

A seagull standing on a rock

Canva

The U.S. Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency has called the 2020 election the “most secure in American history.”

They released a statement in which they said: “There is no evidence that any voting system deleted or lost votes, changed votes, or was in any way compromised.”

This is an SNL skit in the making

Man laughing in front of a blue background

Canva

Finally, the supposedly “Chávez-linked” software was not used in a single one of the swing states won by Biden that Trump is contesting.

One ‘very strong’ witness. Just one.

Giuliani looking surprised

Screenshot / ABC

Let’s not forget, however, the “very strong” witness Sidney Powell alluded to. A military official claimed to have seen the alleged fraud taking place in Venezuela. The Trump team even has a signed affidavit, of which Powell has shared screenshots on her Twitter account. Unfortunately, according to the New York Times, “The screenshots were incomplete and did not include a name or signature, and Ms. Powell did not respond to requests to view the full document.”

Luckily, these communist machines won’t be able to influence the hand-recount.

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